This morning while driving to work, I was reminded of the verse "Be Still and know I am near." A lot of times/days, we all get busy and leave God out. I know that I do that. I especially get soo busy that my quiet times and going to church seems to start to slack and then completely disappear. I need these reminders like the one today. I know during my years at LU, I have been completely stressed out and forget about spending time with God. However, once I began to spend time with God each and every day, I seem to find extra time on my hand. I have always been amazed about how this works. But with God all is possible. Sometimes just have to give everything over to God. Just when I think I have a lot of work to do and probably wont get enough sleep, God gives me strength. God's strength is soo amazing. I dont think I can live with out His strength. Just remember to be still and know that God is near to us all. We can never be anywhere without God near us. I was reminded by that special person that sometimes we just need lay on our backs and still up at the sky waiting and listening for God's voice to share with us His thoughts and plans for our lives.

Sometimes going out on the porch and watching the awesome sunset that God gives me and allows me to witness. While watching the sunset, I think about what God has blessed me with. He has blessed me with out of this world friends, with an awesome boyfriend, with a job, with an awesome family, with a new day with new opportunities to share God's love with others. I am extremely thankful because I know I dont deserve all the blessings that God gives me, but He continues to bless me over and over. I will do anything for Him because of the blessings He bestows on me. Lately, I have been working on giving myself to Him to do with me whatever He wants to do with me. I have been on a rollar coster this year as most of you know. I think I have had enough of those loop-d-lopps and those extremely fast drops. Sometimes we just need to spend some time in those valleys in order to become the person God has planned us to be.

I have always wondered why I have been faced with so many people dying this year. Death is not a fun thing to deal with no matter what their age is. Each life have had an important place in my life and impacted my life differently. But it was their time to be called home. I am slowly learning to deal with these deaths and accepting their deaths. Once I accept these deaths, then I will finally be able to realize the reasons why they had to die when they did. Then God can use me to help others dealing with this. It is hard (I admit) to deal with this. But I am also reminded over and over that things work together for those who love God. Things will work out.

I am so stinking tired right now. Long day at work. My knee was killing me when I got off work. Also my shoulder was killing me. I have no idea why my shoulder was hurting. It was strange. Its better now, but my knee is still killing me.

Tomorrow I dont have class. We have the Mid-AMerican conference here this weekend. Classes were canceled. I have to go to some sessions though and write a many page paper. I can get away with writing one paper for all my classes. So that is a plus. I am going to go to the one on the Civil war tomorrow night. I think it starts at 8.Who knows how long they will last. hopefully not too long. I have to find the hotel too. it is kind of like the C.S. Lewis conference we had on the LU campus this past spring semester.

lets see anything else. My brain is tired. More will come during the day.

my mind has been thinking a lot lately. Maybe it is because of the change I am experiencing in my life. I love the change.

Beauty, what is beauty. my boy posted on this topic earlier today. Oh, that post just made my day. I am like floating on clouds today.

But what is beauty. Beauty is the heart. A lot of people are shallow and see beauty as being appearance. But true beauty is found in the heart. This beauty will always stay. Makes a person really attractive. And beauty is relative. What one person defines beauty as another person might think differently. Never compare yourself to anyone else. Just be who God made you to be. If your not that person, the one God has for you might pass you by. Learn to accept who you are and love yourself. God is molding us to be the person he has prepared for someone. Prepared to be the spouse and the lover of that person. We cant also go out and look for that person. God will bring that person into our life when we are perfect for that person. Patience is the key.

well, thats about my thoughts for now. I got to go to work soon. write more later

I have a lot that I want to say, but I dont know how to put it all into words. As some of you know things are working out between me and a certain guy. It is awesome. He challanges me soo much and is an awesome man of God. He is also has growing wisdom. We are doing a long distance relationship. Both of us are really busy that sometimes it is hard to be able to talk online to each other. But we work it out.

But something we have been talking about lately deals with love. We talk about how love does not happen over night meaning it is not instantly. Instead it grows over time. Love is also blind overlooking certain habits and the past. Sometime the past haunts us and we just need to take care of our past before moving forward in life and in relationships.

God has been good to me lately. I have been able to find a job and find someone special that is just what I need. He and I have talked about can God be mean to us. Does He gives us something to good to be true and then totally takes it away from us? I dont think God is like that. It sounds almost like He would be teasing us. From all my knowledge God is not like that. Sometimes He will give us feelings, emotions, needs, and wants. These will become predominant. God will give us the desires of our heart. I think if God places a desire in our hearts then he will see to it that fulfilled. Sometimes we just have to ask and He is waiting freely to give us those desires. However, sometime He does not because He knows what is best for us and that we should have it later and not now. Just have to be patient with God. Everything happens in His time. I remember a song that we used to sing, "In His Time, He makes all things beautiful, In his time..." I know there is more but that is all I remember. Everything will work together for the good of those who love God. We need to keep God the center of our relationship. We both desire to have God a part. We talk constantly about what we are being taught and learning and being reminded of things. In one of dr. ken's emails, he said that we all are buildings in progress. At first, I didnt understand it. But I did. God is building us each and every day into the person we are to be. We are never a complete building. Because a new floor is being added or a room is being decorated or a part is going through flames to be rebuilt. I need to give up my life to God and allow him to build me to be the person I am supposed to be doing the career he has planed for me. It is hard for me. But I have been leaving a lot up to Him and learning to trust Him in that he will take care of me in my worst hours and days. He will reward you. He has definately rewarded me in who i have as my certain someone. I know I dont deserve him, but God thinks I do. I am not going to fight God. It is a losing battle and there is no point to fighting God because He will win no matter what. I have grown wiser lately thanks to a certain someone.

That is some of what is on my mind. Will probably right more in the morning before work. Have a good one everyone.

hey everyone...its another time for an update...

i have been reminded of something by someone who means a lot to me and who I am learning to care more about each and every day. He posted an entry about worship and our every day actions should be seen as acts of worship to God. I definately need to remember this when I have to go to work and deal with customers and all that stress. We should do each and every action for God. We should even aproach the stuff we dont want to do as doing it for God. Who knows but our doing that could bring someone to Christ and we should not let that opportunity to pass us up.

Yeah i do have a problem with a guy. I like this guy and he likes me back. Who knows what will happen from this. We have way too much stuff going on in our lives to really be able to focus on forming a relationship. both going to school and having homework and other various committments. I think its cool that we have been able to become friends and taking the little steps in forming a long last relationship. I will tell of you at LU more when I visit.

Well, back to my studying for this test. Catch you all later.

ok ok. I will post something. You all have probably been wanting to know what I have been up to lately.

Yesterday, I had to get up at the unheard hour of 3 am. I remember back to those wonderful college days. (man by saying that i feel soo old but I am not old at all but anyways). Normally I would still be in bed. But probably just crawling into bed. I know for a while that would be my roommate's normal bed time. Times are changing. I have to get up at 3 am next saturday day. It totally stinks. There goes another friday night. Bed early. Yeah I cant go to bed at like 8 or 9. But get this. I have to work friday 2-9 and then get up at 3. That stinks. I have not had really consistent hours since that first week or so when i was workint 6-2. I think I get paid this week. I am not totally sure but I think I do.

Ok. enough about work. Now on to school. Yeah school. No motivation for school yet. I have been school for about a month. And i have still not motivation to do anything. But I am getting better. I have started some work more than the night before. I have somewhat started studying for my test i have tuesday night. I have three hours to answer three questions. But according to the professor. These answers have to be very detailed. Ok, this is for my civil war class. The test is covering the area leading up to the civil war and the first two years of the civil war. A lot of material. A lot of details I need to remember.

So I have talked about school and work. Now about my own personal life. Hmm.. Not a whole lot. Have you ever connected with someone of the opposite sex in a way that you find it hard to believe. Just everything seems so perfect. And nothing can be better than being with that person forever. I was discussing what love is with someone today. We came to the conclusion that a person cannot fall into love, but instead love grows between the two as they get to know each other. We also defined love as being with that person makes one feels complete. And when they are apart it feels like a part of them is missing.

My brother starts school this week in seattle. First class for him at 8:30 tomorrow morning. Oh, he has two roommates. Three people to a room. that is gotta stink. I have no idea how big the room is and things like that. He is supposed to be sending me pictures sometimes soon.

Oh, the latest hurricane in florida hit where my grandmother lives. I hope she is ok and all the people we know there.

i got this problem, i like a guy. is there anything wrong with that :)